Dear Trader Joe’s Mini Hold The Cone! Ice Cream cones,
You know that part in Love Actually when the guy holds up the sign that says, “to me, you are perfect”? Of course you don’t, you’re a box of miniature ice cream cones.
Not to rip off that guy, because frankly, I don’t find him attractive, and I think it’s kinda shady that he’s macking on his best friend’s girlfriend like he’s Rick Ocasek (whom I totally hung out with one magical night, but that’s another story), but, Trader Joe’s Mini Hold The Cone! Ice Cream Cones, to me, you are perfect.
I love that you can be devoured in about three bites (two if you’re nasty); I love that you’re only 210 calories (when I eat my self-appointed serving size of three of you), and I love that you have chocolate over the ice cream up top and (SPOILER ALERT!) hidden in the bottom of the cone. That’s what I call surprise and delight, my friends, and that’s what great customer service is all about (cough, cough, West Elm.)
I live in fear that Trader Joe’s will Trader-Joe’s you. Please, Hammer, don’t hurt ’em. Until then, I will adore you and I will devour you. I literally can’t get enough of you.
What’s your favorite Trader Joe’s product? What’s your favorite brand of mini cone? Is “Hold The Cone” a stupid name? (Between you and me, I think it is, but this is a love letter, so I didn’t want to bring it up.) Discuss in the comments.