I did it, guys. I’ve lived for half a century. I’m a decade past the age my friend Alix told me I should officially start shopping at Eileen Fisher. I’m only a year younger than Blanche Devereaux (coincidentally, my phone’s name) was in the Golden Girls. I’m “I like to kick, stretch, and KICK” years … Continue reading 50 Ways to Celebrate Turning 50
j/k, this list is not particularly fast nor furious (we save that for Festivus), but much like my seasonal Facebook albums (ahem, see, “All I Do is Win(ter)” and “Fall-o The Leader”), I’m running out of clever names for these. But since I do believe in the power of gratitude, the list must go on. … Continue reading The 9th Annual Gratitude List: 2 Fast, 2 Furious
Dear Facebook, Oh I’m sorry, you pretentious ass. Dear Meta, I want to tell you a little story. Once upon a time there was a beautiful warrior (what? this is my story) named Natasha. She was a longtime loyal user of Meta, both the Facebook and the Instagram. She even had side Insta accounts, one … Continue reading Dear Facebook
It’s time for my “annual” “year end” round up of the best and worst of the year. Here are some of my most and least favorite things of the year. Best book I read: Tie: Demon Copperhead & We All Want Impossible Things Worst book I read: It Ends With Us (now a controversial movie … Continue reading The Best & Worst of 2024
I trust you’ve set up your Festivus poles, enjoyed some miracles, and participated in some feats of strength. But now, it’s time to air some motherhuggin’ grievances! I have, and I can’t stress this enough, a lot of them. I’m only slightly ashamed to admit that while I often struggle to come up with things … Continue reading Serenity Now! (It’s Festivus Time)
You know, every year I do this list a little later, and every year I make a bunch of excuses for why I didn’t post right on Thanksgiving, but I’m not gonna do that this year. Because no one cares. No one wants to hear my sob story about how I slowly slide down a … Continue reading The Late, Great* Gratitude Post (Year 8)
Dear Body, I’ve been thinking a lot about bodies lately. First, there was that ad during the Olympics that basically talks about marrying one’s body and staying with it “in sickness and health.” But as you know, Body, I’m already married, and while my Beloved farts more than you do, I’m not ready to go … Continue reading Dear Body
I recently had gum grafting surgery, which involves a periodontist stabbing you with Novocaine 8-10 times, then carefully removing the human skin from the top of your mouth, applying it to the receding gum area (in my case, below my bottom front teeth) and then suturing the bloody remainders of your demolished mouth back together. … Continue reading Things That Could Have a Better System
It’s the mostttt wonderful time of the year: Festivus. Time to air our grievances! I’ll go first. Here are a few of my grievances, in no particular order: The “toilet shower” at the Tommie I *do* appreciate my home away from home in Austin, the Tommie. But if I’m staying more than three nights, it … Continue reading Festivus, for the rest of us
Let’s get ready to show gratituuuuuuude! Thanksgiving was (checks watch) 9 days ago, which puts us right on schedule for a perfectly timed gratitude post, based on the elaborate set of rules we agreed upon last year. Doing an annual gratitude list is a little like that I’m Going On a Picnic game where you … Continue reading The 7th Annual Gratitude List
Letters & Lists 