Dear Bees, Originally, this was gonna be a “Suck it, you can’t have him” letter in which I rub it in your face that despite your best attempts, you did not steal my husband from me. You and your little Matriarchal society (respect) drones may have attacked him with your butt swords (I don’t know … Continue reading A Reluctant Thank You Note to Bees
Normally, the Back to School routine is pretty basic: 1) Fail to get official school supply list so wing it with endless supply of pencils that they will never use, Lysol wipes and tissues. It’s 2020 and our kids use computers for everything, but somehow they always convince me that they need 75 pencils with … Continue reading It’s Back to (Home)school Time!
Do you know why I went into advertising? Because I saw the movie “Crazy People.” In the film, Emory Leeson, played by the fabulous Dudley Moore, gets so stressed out by his job as an “advertising executive” (which, like in most ad movies, is actually a hybrid account executive/creative director/media planner role), that he gets … Continue reading Adventures in Advertising – Part 1
Dear Everyone Who’s Ever Emailed Me, In the words of the unlikable Justin Bieber, is it too late now to say sorry? I have a serious email problem. (Nope, not the one about the sign offs.) Like 4,271 unread emails serious. I also have the crappiest system ever invented for responding to emails. The system … Continue reading Dear Everyone Who’s Ever Emailed Me,
After social-distancing for the last seven weeks with the same three people (and one dog), I’m starting to get a feel for the different types of quarantine personas. Take this simple quiz to find out which O’Rourke is your quarantine style twin! 1. My quarantine fashion can best be described as: a. athleisure, same as … Continue reading What’s Your Quarantine Style?
The last time I posted on this blog, it was the last day of 2019. A simpler, easier time, that we foolishly did not realize was a simpler, easier time, because we could not have imagined we’d be living in a real life Station Eleven in a few short months. And yet, here we are. … Continue reading The 7 Stages of Self-Isolating (with Children)
Dear 2009 Me, It’s 2019 you/me, checking in from the precipice of the next decade. (Or the actual next decade? We’ve never been good at Back to the Future math.) So much has changed! But don’t worry, you’re still with these two. You’ve all aged 10 years though, which means Hazy drools less and Matty … Continue reading Dear 2009 Me
Happy Festivus, everyone! We’ve been here before. But has it really been 3 years since we last aired our grievances? Don’t worry, I have plenty. Why does a poker set need to weigh a million pounds, and why did it need to be leaning on the file drawer, and why did I have to be … Continue reading The Airing of Grievances
A couple of years ago, I posted my list of 50 things I was grateful for. And I’m still grateful for all those things (especially you, TJ Maxx), but since gratitude is good for you, let’s turn this thing up to 11, shall we? Here are 20 more things I’m grateful for: My family. This … Continue reading Things I’m Grateful For (continued)
Dear Parent Who Told Their Kid About the Great Pumpkin, I think it’s sweet that you told your child about the Great Pumpkin. Every family has their own holiday traditions, and I’m glad you have yours. My kids had vaguely heard about the Great Pumpkin from the Charlie Brown movie. If you recall, that Great … Continue reading Dear PWTTKATGP