The holidays are a busy time for parents. Not only are we busy decorating, gift-shopping, party-throwing, tree-trimming, threatening and bribing, but we also need to keep things straight in the elaborate web of lies we’ve created around an imaginary fat stranger who spies on us all year and then sneaks into our homes one night … Continue reading FAQs In My Increasingly Complex Christmas Web Of Lies
Dear Wegmans’ Catalog Designer, First of all, kudos to you on finding a somewhat non-clichéd generic holiday image. Clementines! I love it. Quick question though, what are we doing with this peeled clementine? It appears we are stringing a ribbon through the peeled clementine, and then what? Hanging the exposed citrus fruit in the window? I … Continue reading Dear Wegmans’ Catalog Designer
Dear McDonald’s restroom toilet paper dispenser, WHY? Please give me one good reason why you were wet. And with what, pray tell, were you wet?! Actually, don’t answer that. I’ll just put my hands under the Xlerator until my skin is blown off and hope that my new skin is passable as human. Gross. Natasha Continue reading Dear McDonald’s restroom toilet paper dispenser
Dear Readers (Reader? Mom?), I’m super excited to be starting my new blog, where I’ll write two of my favorite things: you guessed it, letters and lists. I may also occasionally add nacho photos, but letterslistsandoccasionalnachophotos.wordpress.com was taken. Here’s why I chose letters and lists: • I love writing letters, both to people and inanimate … Continue reading A “Lister” (“Lettist?”)
