Today, the little person who made me a mom turns eight, which means I’ve been rocking these Mom Jeans™ for eight years now. And while I’ve decidedly got a young soul, we’ve noticed Hazy’s got an old one. She’s like a little Mr. Miyagi trapped in an adorable girl’s body. Come to think of it, she even has one of those rhythmic hand drum thingies like in Karate Kid 2 (it’s called a den den daiko, fools). Here’s some wisdom she’s imparted on me over the years:
- When in doubt, eat mac & cheese.
- If you laugh hard enough at your own jokes, everyone else will laugh too.
- Always Be Adding (songs to your Spotify playlist).
Hazy’s Awesome Mix is currently at 99 songs and counting, (it would be 100 if a clean version of Ayo & Teo’s Rolex were available), and has everything from Pinkie Pie to Missy Elliott and Guns ‘n Roses.
- Shower the people you love with love.
Like, make your mom so many Mother’s Day cards and books and paper cell phones that she’s dangerously close to appearing on an episode of Hoarders but totally doesn’t care because she feels so ridiculously loved.
- Fashion is meant to be fun.
Also, accessories are key. - Anybody can sing and everybody can dance.
Whether your father will deem your dancing style “appropriate” is another matter.
- What’s the rush? It’s totally fine to take 20-30 minutes to pick out your clothes in the morning.
That’s a lie; I have yet to truly learn this, but not for her lack of trying to teach me.
- Be unflinchingly honest.
“You’re fat.”
“Hazy, that’s not nice to say.”
“I was just talking about his body!”
Can’t wait for whatever’s next, Hazelbert. Happy Birthday!
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